You Want What You Can’t Have

by PROexploit

It is a universal and common feeling to want things that you don’t have. The shiny new car, a better job or the girl that doesn’t like you. But why do people feel this way? What causes us to desire things we don’t have more then we do? There are two main reasons in my opinion.

Rarity

When something is rare, its value increases in the eyes of viewers. There is a exponential effect that as more people desire something you want it too. When there isn’t enough of said object to go around, people left without desire it even more. You can see this effect in action with eBay auctions or the ridiculous prices that some famous works of art sell for. If they simply enjoyed the beauty of the art, why wouldn’t a replica or reproduction be acceptable to them?

Opposition

We all have a little bit of opposition in us, some more than others. We always want to be in control of ourselves, as we should. So when we are told we can’t have something, there is an immediate psychological reaction of desire and need to act out. If a young child is told “you can’t have that cookie” they desire it even more then before so they can say “oh yeah? I do what I want to”. This same base reaction is observed in people of all ages.

Now that you’re aware of the main causes behind these compulsive desires, you can work towards making a conscious effort to be happy with what you have and evaluate new “needs” on a levelheaded basis.